I've made a choice to stop being a whiny bitch and look for a new job. I'm terrified of the unknown, but I need to suck it up and do it. It's not like I need the money and I have resources to find another job. I work hard, and I know I can meet challenges successfully, but you'll never know that if you've ever interviewed me. I comb blogs and friends for tips, practice in front of the mirror, and even have a mental Rolodex of examples of my virtues, but the moment I step into the room, my voice will start shaking (once it was so bad that my teeth were chattering like it was below freezing) and my pits become drenched in the most vinegary sweat.
One of the most common tips my friends give me is that I need to act like I know shit I don't know anything about. And being the dumbass I am, I followed this piece of gold nugget today. So when my interviewer asked me about my skills in Excel, I made it sound like I shat Excel rainbows on a daily basis. So when his follow up question was "Can you please tell me what the "and" function does?" I freaked out and sputtered a few mumbled words out, but I knew I was done. I feel like an asshole for lying, and I should have gone with the truth. So I've learned my lesson, and from now on, this bitch is going do me...is that how the saying goes?